"My busy acting schedule can really be tough on my complexion. After returning home from a hard day's prancing around in front of a film crew, I use The Revenge of Carlos Plynkes. It contains the miracle ingredient Plynxwellox, which has been proven by top scientists in a field to reverse the seven signs of ageing for up to eight minutes per application.
The Revenge of Carlos Plynkes. For truly beautiful skin."
Though scientifically proven to reverse ageing in our labs, there is no actual evidence it works. Not to be taken internally. May cause skin irritation and drowsiness.